And I know it seems like I'm always falling down...

Well I'm kinda annoyed right now. Because my sister borked the computer desk so I have to type with the keyboard on my lap so I'm like turned away from the screen so I can't see what I'm writing and ugh it sucks. And the stupid laptop. Ugh. If my friends would like to give me lots of money so I can buy a new one, that'd rock. Lol.
Some guy died today. Yah. Sounds really random like that. Cause I'm sure Some Guy dies every day. But that's beside the point. Thing is that he went to WUS and now he's like dead and it's not fair because it's like... ugh. There are so many people in the world that actually WANT to die and then people who don't wanna die and don't deserve to die and have like their whole lives ahead of them...they get killed by their friends in car accidents. I didn't even know this guy. None of us really knew this guy. Well ok Hannah had sat in a car with him a few days ago. But she didn't fucking know him and yet she was fucking crying over him.
Anyway. I wish his soul or whatever eternal peace and happiness or whatever the hell happens.
So yah I had a point. Uh...I was writing this because I'm pissed off with my father. I haven't seen him in...god, it must be like a month by now. And he's probably not gonna come over tomorrow because HE HAS A FUCKING COLD!
But I guess it'd be good if he didn't come over.

"EEEEWWWW! Dirty Greebos!"

I was gonna blog yesterday but then I started and then I couldn't be arsed. I feel it is important to warn y'all that this is gonna be fairly random, cause I feel kinda...stream-of-consciousness lately, which has the potential to be cool, but usually isn't. Like now. I feel like having a blog of funny things today.
Anyway. Uh...the funniest thing I can remember about yesterday was maths. I know, maths and funny don't generally go together, but this was an exceptional case. Duh. Firstly, my teacher the Caveman was later than usual, so it was like ten minutes before he showed up, then we were all settling down for another five minutes and then he set us five questions to do, went off on a little speech about how exams are evil (I dunno if that was really what he was on about due to tuning out, but I think that's the general vibe of it) and then I answered the first two questions...then the rest were too confusing. But then the Caveman buggered off somewhere, so I sat listening to the Chavs talking about "Dirty Greebos" (they're so civilized...well I guess we do call them Chav Scum) and when he came back the fire alarm went off and it was really funny because he just thought it was the bell for breaktime so he goes "Don't worry, you won't be delayed." And we all just looked at him for a minute and then we were like "Sir, that's a fire alarm." And he said "OH well then" and we all went out the fire door. I walked with Scott and Sam and we were laughing our heads off mocking the Caveman. Then we couldn't find the line so we all linked arms and wandered until we found it. Then the line was fun because Hannah's behind me and she rocks lol. And I was freezing so she kept hugging me. Hmm...this has happened before. Anyway, yah, twas funny. Then they extended break for us so yah cool.
Uh...today. Let me see how long I can make this.
First I had German, which was ok, because I don't think we really did very much. Uh...I remember having to answer like...two questions, which, lol, is actually a lot for me. So yah. And then me and Emma spent a vast amount of time moo-ing at each other and saying "The cow goes moo!" and stuff. That was fun. Then we were laughing at my headphones on the language labby thing (what do you call that actually? A workstation? I dunno. Always makes me feel like a pilot, or a DJ because mine always slip so I have to hold them on but then I need to write so I'm like grabbing them with one hand and writing with the other and my hair falls in my face so then I can't see...lol I hate the lanuage lab) because they were half borked. So yah...
Then I had Science. And MY GOD I was so retarded. The work was pretty easy. Mostly just copying off the board, then I made the guys do the experiment, which was really easy anyway, I'm just lazy. So yah I was really bored. So I went to talk to Glen and Nick and the Cat in the Hat and they were all massacring a calculator, which is obviously very normal behaviour...actually, for them it probably is. I decided to leave them to it, then later they started chucking the buttons at me. Meh. Anyway, as I've already said, I was really bored. And when I'm bored in Science I have a tendency to colour in the nail of my left hand little finger. A few times red and black, sometimes just black, once just red...well today I decided on blue. Dougie has these pens that he won't let me use, but I nicked them and then I took the blue one and I was colouring my nail in and it was so smooth and lovelyful to colour with and it suited my nail...when he nudged me. And it smudged. HE SMUDGED MY NAIL! Well I was like screw that, can't have a smudged nail. And being the retard that I am I stuck my finger in my mouth. And MY GOD that pen was the worst tasting stuff in the world! I mean, I've like drunk scented gel pen ink (yah that kinda makes it seem worse...that tastes pretty bad. But it makes you spit pretty colours. So bonus) but this was like arrrrrrgh times worse. So I was like "Oh my GOD that's DISGUSTING! and I got kinda stuck on a loop saying that over and over and I had loads of tictacs and I was laughing and apparently (according to Eddie) I was crying too. So yah I had a total freak out about how bad it tasted. Then after that Eddie was like "You're so over dramatic. No way does it taste that bad!" But he didn't wanna taste it so I win. Lol I'm so immature. OOO also I stole one of these little polystyrene balls because I wanted it. Good decision.
Uh...then we had break and I can't really remember anything much happening at break. Nothing much happens at break. Methinks twas cold. And methinks I ate Battenburg. And then me and Emmoa had History together with Mr Featherstone, and those lessons are always funny, and we got good marks for the test, so yay, but Cat in the Hat didn't hand hers in, horror of horrors! Lol. And sir sods off a lot, so when he disappeared I started a game of mini ping pong with Emma, which we turned into mini table football with our books as goals after we kept losing the ball...lol that rocked. Then I had to hide the ball when sir came back because he probably would have confiscated it.
Uh...Maths after that. OOO I actually understood the work. It was one of those lessons where part of me gets it but then if I try and work out what I'm doing I'm just totally lost. So I have to just trust my instincts and not stop in the middle. AND I got them ALL RIGHT! I was soooo proud.
Lunch was funny. We kept making Enchio laugh (not that it's hard, it's so easy to make her laugh and it's so sweet how easy it is to make her laugh) and there were the usual sexual innuendos (does that have another e? I dunno.) and the usual guys-treating-Mayory-like-a-ragdoll and I was freezing as usual. Also, me and Hannah are convinced that Enchi asked Hannah if she wanted to hold hands, but apparently that's not what she said. And Emmoa went mad giving out too many smarties. Lol usual lunch time.
Last lesson was...I.T. Ughness. At least I didn't get told off today. Nearly did but I saved myself at the last minute. Lightning reflexes. Hahahahaha. Yah I hate him. He sucks.
Home now. And freeeeeeeezing. And my room smells weird so I had to open the windows so it's gonna be like a fridge in there. And I get abandoned tonight.

"There's seven left but I can't count!"

Today I quote Mr Cottrell, the Arse RS Teacher. He gave me a good blog post title, for which I am grateful, and me and Enchio were laughing a lot in his lesson, and generally trying to ignore the Chavs, and if he calls me Hannah again I will scream, and Naisha copied my work, as usual, even though it was like copying off a sheet. Is she that moronic? We didn't get green cards or commendations or anything.
Science was actually ok. Open evening gives us an excuse to arse about in our science lessons, "making posters". Well...I do pretty much nothing, Emma does most of the work, Enchio helps and Sam does more than me but still not that much. I just kinda sat there and tried to make the others laugh, which was fun, then I walked into a stack of chairs without the chair part...lol, I know I make very little sense, then we messed around with feathers, and, horror of horrors, we got permanent marker on the table. BUT it's all ok. Because you can get rid of it with alcohol. Which I never knew. So yah the teacher has a purpose. Finding uses for alcohol. Lol.
And uh...break was kinda dull. Stole sugar from Emma, gave random hugs (only to buddypals; I'm not that friendly), watched Enchi get beaten up, then watched Mary beat Nick up. Yah, my friends are a little odd. Then I told Laura lots of times that we had Drama and she was like oh ok and then we walked off together, then I waited outside Drama with Vicky and that was fun...Drama sucked. It seriously sucked. I have to perform tomorrow, and I have pretty much no idea what I'm doing, so... Oh, and it's being filmed. And assessed. So I'm failing Drama already. Yay me! And there's gonna be film evidence of it.
Sociology after that. Wasn't that bad. Way better sitting next to Sam. The Chavs of the class (and Rowan) spent nearly all of the lesson discussing bunking school, skipping lessons, giving each other tips on how to skip and bunk and forge notes for PE and how to avoid getting caught...actually considering the note forgery. PE first lesson. How cruel. Enchio loves it. How weird. Lol.
Lunch was kinda dull.
German was kinda dull. We were in the Language Lab, which resulted in the usual choruses of "Oh no!" and "Oh dear!" from me and Emma. Lol. Emma is a great person to have as a friend. Not much happened. Mr Chalmers got me freaked out about failing German. And there was much discussion of sneaking out to use the toilet because Mrs Robertson was standing right outside the door and she tells people they're not allowed to go to the toilet and sends them back to the lesson, which we don't think she should be allowed to do since Mr Chalmers is in charge of us and he gave us permission. Anyway.
Yah. So...dayish.

Things have never been so swell!

Well ok. Today was a bouncy day. As in it was yaysome and then it was arghish and then it was yaysome...you get the picture. Uh...Double Sociology first two lessons. My GOD I hated it. I hated it hated it HATED IT...and again you get the picture. Lol. But nah, tis fixed now, thanks to the wonders of Sam. I shall explain because it was kinda funny, but I do have a weird sense of humour.
I am meant to sit next to Charlotte *cough* Chav whore *cough* and Sam is meant to sit next to some guy called Matthew, who everyone calls Cookie, which I just find annoying. But anyway. And in Soc. you're meant to discuss stuff a lot. But Charlotte never talked to me. She never even looked at me. It's very hard to talk to someone who is trying very hard to pretend you don't exist. But anyway. Lol. And so we were meant to be talking about the sheet and Miss Knight came to the back of the room to get a book and she looked and me and Charlotte sitting in silence, then she looked at Sam and Matthew sitting in silence, and then she asked if Sam would like to move to sit next to me. WHO0OOOOOOOOOOOT! The Bestest Thing EVER! So me and Sam had fun sitting together. And we got the work done. So that was cool. And then at lunch we went to see Mr F, our head of year, because we were kinda thinking we might drop Soc., but then he kinda talked us out of it, and he kept making me laugh, and then he said "Thanks for not laughing at me" when we left, and I just laughed some more... So yah, then me and Sam went to see Miss Knight. And we asked if we could sit together permanently. And SHE SAID YES! So now I sit with Sam in all my Sociology lessons, whcih ROCKS in case you hadn't worked that part out yet. There was a funny moment when me and Sam were trying to explain why the group sucks. Miss Knight doesn't seem to understand the concept of the group sucking, which is a group full of Chavs, so yah...
Then we had break and Emma brought in coloured sugar and it tastes sooo good. It kinda melts in your mouth...ooo it is soo lovelyful. We shall worship Emma if she brings more. I don't know why Emma gets all the yummy food though. Lol.
Then I had German, and I spent my German lesson trying to avoid getting asked a question (SUCCESS!) and watching my hands shake (even more than usual) and writing some utter bollocks about myself. And also it seems I forgot the word for snake, which is clearly common knowledge. At least one would think that from the reaction Mrs Chalmers gave me. Uber bitch. Me and Cat got in an argument with Ashley and Random Chav Guy, oh, no, wait, I'm wrong. Random Rude Boy. Yah, because Chavs wear Burberry. And Rude Boys are so much different. Yup. But anyway the argument was fun.
Then we had History. I hate History lessons with Mr Strickland. He scares the hell out of me. He just seems so hyped up and speedy all the time...he's like jumping round the classroom, scribbling on the board (I can't read his handwriting and stupid Joe I sit next to covers his book so I can't copy, then blatantly copies mine), running past the interactive whiteboard, saying lots of stuff over and over, playing around with the computer, rummaging around in filing cabinets...ugh he scares me so much. He has waaaay too much energy. It just makes me tense up whenever I go in his classroom. I sit there all tensed up and trying not to look at him because it just freaks the hell out of me that he can have that much energy when I find it so hard to get out of bed. I know I said that I think Josh is like a puppy on speed, but Mr Strickland beats him by miles. He is like a puppy on coke, speed, sugar and caffeine on Christmas morning, while being drunk. *Shudder*
Then lunch was kinda dull except for the sorting out of Sociology. And the eating of Emma's happy smiley lemon cake square things. They were nice. And they did make you wanna smile. So we all did. Then we evaluated them and we all tried to out random each other.
Media started off crappy, but then I got to move next to Emma because we're "working together" again. She does most of the work. I offer encouragement and say random words. It's a good team.
I guess all in all it was a good day. I sure as hell seem to have babbled long enough.

All the small things...

I'm gonna go right ahead and pretend that today is just a dayish day, and I'll just plaster on a fake smile and do my best not to yell.
So far I've been pissed off because my crappy laptop is borked. So that sucks. And it means I may lose loads of files, which really sucks. Then I won't be able to type in my bed! Oh the horrors!
Then my TV remote fell off the bed and I can't find it. So that was faintly annoying.
But I've decided I don't care. I'm gonna go back through my saved MSN conversations and find things that make me laugh or make me smile. And then my buddypals will cheer me up without even knowing it. Because they are that brilliant.
Apparently I have to look through catalogues for clothes today. God, when my dad gets back, he is SO taking me shopping in Cambridge. I need Cult clothes! Lol. I have one long sleeved top, and tis sooo cold. So I'm still in T-shirts and shivering. Meh. Anyway, need to go shopping in Cambridge and get my dad to buy me clothes and fudge...and I want a bass guitar. A pink one. OOO and my CD shopping spree too. God, I'm gonna be spending money like crazy.

Butlins - The Revolution!

Today I think I shall post a happy blog. I shall talk mostly about lunchtime, because that was fuuuuun.
Firstly, most people disappeared to The Hobo-Philip's detention or the band practice, and they still have a crappyful name. And twas raining, which we like, but then ya get the whole drowned rat look going on and when you put your bag down on the desk for the next lesson it soaks the table then you have to write in a puddle, so I remembered that and put my bag under the window ledge, and I am very proud of myself for that. Lol. OOO I'm sorry if I make typos. I'm not paying much attention to what I'm typing atm. Trying to improve my touch-typing and my typing speed, because they're kinda sucky...
Then those of us who were left were standing around eating lunch and talking...and then twas funnyful because I said we should go be groupies, and Mayory thought I said that we should pretend to be peas, so then she pretended to be a pea and none of us knew what she was doing so we were like huh? And she was like I'm being a pea...oh, that's not what you said? Then Emma decided that Mayory should have like subtitles for what she's doing.
Crud, I'm writing like a four year old AGAIN. My writing has sooo gone downhill lately.
Anyway, so we had food sharing going on, because people kept appearing with chips and then Mayory split her Penguin with me and Chris, so that was nice. Then Cat appeared and she had COFFEE! So after a few oh-so-subtle hints... (MMM Coffee! Wow! You have coffee!) she shared her coffee with me, but some people kept trying to warm their hands on it, when they had gloves... And I was very cold for much of the time so Hannah kept hugging me, which was also very nice of her. I really love my friends. I appreciate them very muchly. They are lovelyful wonderful peoples and I love them all.
Then Mary and Hannah and Enchi and me went round the back to listen to the band, which we usually do, only normally we don't take Hannah and we take Chris, but whatever. Change is good. And Mayory turned into a younger version of herself again with weirded out hand movements and random yelling and crazy singing of a riff...we love young Mary. Enchi and me were just kinda like, yah they're gonna get pissed off and hate us. So we stayed away from the window. But Sam came over and opened the windows then opened the blinds and that was annoying me and I'm not even in the band. Poor band. We were trying to work out what Nick was actually doing. It seems he was taking control, looking at himself in the mirror, posing and not playing his guitar with his right hand when he's left handed...I dunno.
I had History last lesson. We had to answer three questions. I wrote four pages in under an hour. I was impressed, but my hands were aching and my fingers are sooo cramped now.
OOO take away chips. I don't like them, but the family were happy so whatever. Things that make the family happy are good. I wonder when my dad's coming home...well not home home but Cambridge home. Lol. It's so nice to be told all the plans and stuff. I only knew like the night before he went away that he was going on holiday. Again. So yah, love him loads. Ha. But the mother says I carry around too much bitterness about the past and too many insecurities from the past too. So I'm just living in the past or something. Oh well.
And also? The vitamins aren't happy pills. OOO also I dunno if I can take tablets. Lol. I'm so weird, but I've never taken a tablet before.

And all my sandcastles spend their time collapsing...

Veeeeery prettyful song. OOO I have been awarded many bonus points for going to school today, and there is the proudness factor too, so Tasha is being treated very nicely by the mother, and she is allowed to have a CD shopping spree as soon as she gives the mother the money for the last CD shopping spree, which she can do easily since she has OVER £100!!! Who0t! Life rocks sometimes, and sometimes it sucks, and I dunno, I guess it still sucks, but it's just the way you look at it. And today I have my rose-tinted glasses.
Lol. I have a talent for making guys think I'm pissed off at them.
GOD science was SOOOOOO fun. We were sooo immature. I love our immaturity. We should all work together more often. Nick is actually really immature and I hadn't noticed until recently, but whatever. Also, he doesn't believe us that our English teacher worships him. She does. Tis true.
Anyway, don't think I can babble much more. So...I wish y'all muchly health and wealth and happyness. And I send you all *HUGS* and *SMILES* and *LOVE* and...and...*CHOCOLATE*. Methinks twould be good if everyone could join me in my Realm of Happyness. But clearly you won't all share my views.

You're just like an angel. Your skin makes me cry.

Ok, I was in a bad mood all day today. Sorry WUS people. I love you all really. And poor Glen...stuck talking to me. Lol, I dunno. And I avoided the heart cutty uppyness. Then Glen and Nick grossed me out. So that was nice of them. But Nick didn't mean to. He didn't know his hands were covered in blood. Ugh, he's so gonna be a murderer. And in IT I kinda sat there not doing work, and sir was mean to me, and I realised that Mr Glenville reminds me of Philip from Shaun of the Dead, which is an awesome film. Everyone should see it. I was watching it today, but then I fell asleep, so then I wasn't watching it anymore...
And uh...my sister's friend Alex was round for dinner. She's nice. I like her. I'm writing like I'm four!
Today was kinda crappy.
The Vines...I underappreciate them. I like them, but I never remember I like them.
Hmm...even though I am sometimes pissy at people for trying to help me and be nice to them...I actually really do appreciate it. I am very grateful that Glen spent most of lunchtime keeping me company. And I am very grateful that my friends know when I need space. Tis nice.

Remember me when you're the one who always dreamed...

Hmm...I need something different to say today. Today sucked. I had a bad day. I don't wanna go on about that though because everyone's sick of my moaning and stuff. So...anyway.
Uh...good things about today. OOO I came up with a new mission, which I will post soonly. And I have time to write today, which rocks. But my muses have abadoned me. Well actually no. My muses are there. But I dunno...it's pathetic.
Uh...right I shall now write out some Reasons to be Beautiful, meaning, some positivity so that y'all have some positive vibes and happy buzz and glowyness and stuff, which you all deserve very muchly.

Reason One : Life isn't like it is in 1984. (That whole concept freaks the hell out of me. I spent English shuddering, but then I started wondering how they managed to implement this system in the first place, so then that kinda distracted me, and if I'd been asked a question I would've been screwed, which I was. So yah English teacher thinks I'm a retard, which is also partly Enchio's fault, but I forgive her because she is so lovely.)

Reason Two : The wonders of sugar.

Reason Three : The lovelyness of music. (Start the day with the right song and you have a happy buzz.)

Reason Four : The amazing happy buzz.

Reason Five : Reasons to be beautiful peoples! Make the world a beautiful place! It needs some beauty. There's beauty in the breakdown. There's beauty and magic all around. Appreciate the small things...Be impressed by the small things in life because the big things don't happen. Mayory quote that I found funny.

Reason Six : Niall compliments and James' MSN names and Enchio mumblings and Emmo Cake! (I didn't step on it. Yay!)

Reason Seven : Wow look how high I can count!

Reason Eight : You have an imagination, so let's pretend I said something clever.

There are your reasons to be beautiful people. So go for it.

I laughed the loudest, who'd have known?

Today was dayish. Maybe I use that phrase too often? Anyway...
Soc. was actually ok today. Didn't seem that long.
And German was easy. We actually went over the alphamabet, which was kinda random but whatever, and then we learnt to spell our names. Yaysome! Made me feel so proud. But, seriously, when is anyone ever gonna want me to spell my name in German? Tis strange.
Then break was kinda dull. Meh. Always is. Twas cold at break. Ughness. I should really get a coat...
English...we read our books, then we started reading Nineteen Eighty Four and making notes...ha. I wrote like four things. They better not be important. I dunno, I think that book's ok. I liked it anyway. Ha! I'm so odd. But I dunno, just thought it was good. And it's a really horrible idea, that Big Brother could be watching them anytime and hears everything and knows everything and you can get killed for your thoughts...Ughness. But I don't even like the fact that they take pictures and film of you when you don't know and they can trace your emails and texts and stuff and they can find out where you are from your mobile phone...eep. I hate technology.
Anyway...then I had Drama and I hate Chavs. So yah Drama kinda sucked and that's bad because it's meant to be my fun lesson that I love where I get to play Pretend and stuff. So yup that wasn't good.
Lunch was also kinda dull. We mocked Catherine and then I was listening to Cat's music, which is way better than Cat's punk music that I hated, but then Cat kept moving and she kept pulling on the wire so I gave up on that.
Science was just...ugh. I wanna move!
And I am home now and gonna go eat soon and I am freeeeezing and my feet are cold and my hands feel kinda funny...that's another thing for me to stress about now.

If I start a commotion, I run the risk of losing you and that's worse...

Hmm...this was gonna be something different. I'll come back to it.

Ok back now. Everyone has flaws and perfect people would make the world boring...fuck knows why.

Hmm...I am not pissed off. I just like to rant...and delete my rants when I feel it is time to make my blog happyful. I am actually surprisingly happy. Bet you can't guess why? Lol, nah we don't want you to guess why. And we don't wanna tell you either. Happiness is a mystery.

I guess this pack of wolves will pass for friends...

Not that I'm not grateful for my friends. Because I am. I just liked the phrase. From a song. So meh. OOO Shaun of the Dead rocks. And YAYSOME! I am sooo happyful. Because I finished reading Hitchiker's Guide to the Galaxy today. Tis my own personal mission to reread the first three and then read the last two, thus finishing the series. I am appreciating it way more this time. Tis sooo funnyful. Everyone should read it. Tis very cheering-uppy.
Not that I need cheering up. I was actually very happyful for most of today. Mebbe the vitamins did fix me. Lol. They taste realllly bad. Very chalky. Apparently they are strawberry flavour. Methinks not.
My feet are freezing. I forgot to repaint my toenails. Oh well. Gives me something to do at midnight when I can't sleep.
My sister passed out at work today. That's nice to know.
The Late Night Crazies are deaded. My conversations are all deaded. My muses are busy getting drunk and yelling at each other and beating me over the head with their spare limbs. I fear my muses. They are scary supernatural beings.
Today I was trying to work out how long you would fall for. It's a weird kinda thing to try and work out. But it seemed interesting.
Methinks I shall end this now.

Well he's a friend and he's so proud of ya. Well he's a friend and we're so proud of ya.

I think it needs to be said that this will be a whiny blog. God, I swear I'm turning emo. I have been corrupted...Oh well. Not a problem. Nah, that's not a problem.
I do wanna talk to people. But I just don't feel like I have anyone to talk to at the moment. Ha! Lies! Lying is so easy. So natural. Everyone does it. Lying... But then can't you lie so much that you don't even know when you're being honest? And does lying help? I dunno. Does it help? I am seriously asking here. Does lying help? Would you rather have lies than truth? Lies are so much easier to hear. Lies are what people want to know. No one wants the truth, however much they say they do. Damn lying people. Everyone fucking lies. Everyone is a fucking lie. Great quote Enchi.

Time is an illusion...

Today was dayish. That's my way of describing days lately. I dunno why. Anyway, twas a dayish day. Not much happened. Twas fun waiting outside German. We were mocking the jumper wearing rule and got in an argument with Mrs Robertson and Nick was nearly forced to wear his jumper... *Shudders* The idea of Nick wearing his jumper is just too creepy for words... So yah that was fun. Then at break I don't think much happened. Nothing ever happens at break. And at lunch nothing much happened. Except me and Enchi decided Chris would be gay, and then Enchi got drunk and fell over twice, so that was funny. So yah Gay for a Day Chris...I dunno why. I just got kinda hyped up and was going mad with all the hey and the hi and stuff and then I dunno how it happened but suddenly Chris was gay... But tis over now. Sadly.
What else? Uh...lessons sucked but that's normal. The school part of school is always crappy. But...I GOT GERMAN! Yah! I knew what was going on! And I corrected Emma! Which was mean, but it proves I KNEW WHAT I WAS DOING! Yaysome!
As opposed to Maths. I do not get maths. It is evil. And being taught by the Caveman...my GOD! I have not got a hope in hell of getting above a B. I am so stupid. I just sit there and wonder what the hell he's on about and it makes me so depressed. I feel so useless sitting there next to Random Guy Who Doesn't Talk To Me And I Think I'm Allergic To. It sucks. I swear Caveman picked the two dumbest people in the room and plonked them next to each other.
Stupidness is clearly spreading. I have now made a stupid blog entry too.

How can I undo the tangle of these webs I keep weaving?

I shall now blog. I feel like blogging.
I'm gonna rant about the fact that the guys (e.g Glen and Nick and Chris, the sulky ones, even though they swear it's brooding, well w/e) can go off and sulk (or brood, but w/e) by themselves and they get lefted alonesome. Tis true. They go off and turn their backs to people and stand apart from everyone and have distance and stuff. And they get LEFT ALONE. Whereas I sulk (I don't brood. That's just silly...) and almost instantly one of the sulky guys will come over and sit right next to me and make me talk...which I have decided is kinda nice.
Enchi didn't mind that I had my back turned to her. I have told her that sometimes I don't wanna talk to people and she got it and as far as I know she couldn't give less of a shit! So meh! Ugh, nah he was being nice. Methinks. It's just me being all sulky and twisting it in my head so it makes him seem like the bad guy, when really we all know twas me...

I'll describe the way I feel, weeping wounds that never heal

Today has a nice cheery Placebo title. Just for the hell of it. Today was dayish. Nothing much happened. I was kinda out of it at lunch. I think Emma called me like three times before I noticed, which is really weird considering she was sitting right next to me. But oh well. Sorry Emma. And uh...good points of the day. Since we are focussing on the positives. Uh...good things. Good things? Hmm...well. There were no bad things. So that counts as a plus. Oh, wait, no. There were bad things. So, ok...good things... Ugh nevermind.

Ok, Enchio is helping me think of positive things. So...we have:
Lewis is on holiday!
Mr Cottrell made us laugh and gave me a quote for the back of my organiser.
I only got one piece of hwk, which is only like a half piece anyway.

And...uh...meh. Ok...ugh. OOO I have my singing lesson tomorrow. First singing lesson of the year. Mr Hunt kinda...hates me. But I don't mind. I love to piss him off. Apparently, if you twiddle your fingers that really pisses him off. But so far I have just settled for laughing at nothing, staring off into space, forgetting to breathe and asking random questions in the middle of his speeches. He loves to make speeches. Mostly about balloons and babies in supermarkets. I have no clue what he's on about most of the time, hence the laughing at nothing and staring off into space, and then in the middle of his sentence asking a random question that he probably just answered in the form of a rant...

OOO, feeling kinda crappy atm. Lol, no worse than usual, but I dunno. It's the little things that bug me. Like this morning I was walking into school with the mother (yeah, that's what happens when your mother's a librarian) and she asked if I had any good lessons. And I said no. Then she said something like well just be cheery anyway. Then...this is the part that got to me. She said "Actually, no, that doesn't work for you. I can't remember the last time I could've called you cheerful." I don't get how she can bother me as much as she does. Does she have NO IDEA how she makes me feel? Ugh.

Oh, and also feeling guilty. Because I'm quitting viola, which pissed the mother off because she's paid for the term and it was kinda expensive then I'm quitting without having any of the term's lessons so yeah, and it's not like we're made of money, so... ugh.

There's no need to make a sound when you've got smiles instead

OOO I had a crud day, but then I came home and I read my comments, and then I got a happy buzz. So yaysome! And I can't really be arsed to say anything right now. OOO, just add that the livejournal is private, except methinks to Enchio...

Today is a lovely day to run

I've decided that all my titles must refer to other stuff. So this refers to a song. Again.
Anyway, today I've hardly done anything. I did some homework. Still have half my Drama left to do. That and revise my Science. Oh and I am now totally convinced that I will fail German. So that's fun. If someone could please kill Lewis I might stand more of a chance. So...someone? Please?
Uh...what else can I babble about? Oh yah. I adjusted my livejournal. That was fun. Now I have an avatar. So yeah, that's cool. And I had Revels, which I love, and I was surprised that there are like five E numbers in Revels, which is only two less than Smarties, and I really didn't expect that. That was random.
Uh...what else? Oh yuh. If I OD on vitamins, there's a laxative effect. I found that funny. Uh...apparently I've been lovely all day today. So that's good to know. Other things that are good to know...hmm...it's good to know that I am wanting to buy thirteen new CDs, a DVD series and three books. It's good to know that I owe the mother loads of money. It's good to know that not only do I want one of my buddies to be an assassin and kill Lewis, I also want one of my buddies to randomly decide to give me all their money so I can buy lots and lots of stuff, which would obviously make me very happyful...
Oh, by the way, today can be a happy day. I don't mind. Someone broke my greenhouse though, so the illusions are kinda worn out.
Ok, so I'm thinking I should probably go and finish my Drama homework now. Except it needs the ability to draw. So we're thinking no. We're also thinking who out of the buddypals can draw a picture for Tasha and then Tasha can pretend she did it? Because that'd rock. In for Tuesday, so WUS peoples should help me and AGS guys can just give me money instead, and plot to kill Lewis. God, I shouldn't even joke about you guys helping me that much. That's just mean.
So I'm gonna...no. I'm not gonna go do Drama homework because we have already established that I am incapable of that.

New Way to be Human

Ok, so I've decided to start yet another blog. I never post anything interesting. But I decided to have another blog anyway.

Everyone has their own shit to wade through. Just some people have more than others. And some people end up making their own dramas, which just make everything worse, and then they take on all their friends' problems too, because they so want their friends to be happy, but then no one's happy, and the ones that are are either fake happy or rubbing it in everyone's faces, or they feel guilty for being happy. Everyone's a bastard and everyone's a lie.